Darling, let me tell you a secret: confidence isn’t magic. It’s neuroscience…in fishnets.
Most of us think of confidence as something you either have or you don’t. The truth? Your brain is constantly tricking you into or out of confidence, depending on how you train it. That means confidence isn’t a personality trait. It’s a brain trick you can learn, practice, and even costume in sequins.
The Science-y Bit ✨
Your brain runs on patterns. Every time you step on stage, into a meeting, or up to a mic, your body floods with stress chemicals. Cortisol spikes, your heart races, and your brain screams: Danger! That’s normal. Your amygdala is just doing its job.
But here’s where the trick comes in: your brain doesn’t actually know the difference between fear and excitement. The same chemicals, the same rapid heartbeat, the same sweaty palms, all of that is up to your interpretation to decides whether you crumble or strut. Or cry or slay.
Psychologists call this “reframing.” Performers call it “showtime.”
The Showgirl Hack 💃
When I’m backstage, corset laced, rhinestones glued, brain buzzing with nerves, I tell myself: I’m not afraid, I’m energized. That reframe is everything. I channel those jitters into presence, projection, and power.
And here’s the kicker: the more often you do this, the more your brain learns to associate high-energy moments with confidence instead of panic. Practice doesn’t just make perfect, it rewires your cortex. But let’s be real: Practice doesn’t make perfect, anyway. Perfect practice makes perfect—but that is a philosophy for another post.
The Business Parallel 📊
This isn’t just for showgirls. Imagine pitching to investors, presenting in class, or having that difficult conversation at work. If you treat your nerves as proof you care instead of proof you’re failing, you walk in with a very different posture.
It’s not “fake it till you make it.” It’s “teach your brain to flip the script.”
Try This
Next time you’re nervous, say out loud: I’m excited. (Yes, even if you don’t feel it yet.)
Stand tall, take up space. Posture tells your brain, We’re safe here.
Repeat after me: Confidence is not a personality. It’s a practice.
Closing Curtain
Confidence isn’t born, it’s built. It’s not something you’re given; you have to rehearse it. And every time you reframe fear into fuel, you’re rewiring your brain to strut a little bolder, whether you’re in stilettos or sneakers.
Remember, darling: your brain is your best costume piece. Dress it well.
With sequins & strategy,
💋 Chrissy (aka Lavinia Vale, The CEO Showgirl)